Affair Recovery

Affair Recovery

There was a period of time in our country where partners were expected to stay with their spouse after an affair. It was considered deeply shameful to divorce. The tables seem to have turned, however, as we now live in a more autonomous and self-realizing culture; it’s often expected that the ‘victim’ of an affair will leave the unfaithful spouse in order to make a statement of self-respect. Now, if you stay with your partner after they’ve had an affair, you may feel ashamed and humiliated, as though you’re not strong enough to leave. You may even hear from well-meaning friends and family that “you deserve better.”

Although the therapists at PCT are by and large hopeless romantics, we are also realists. We are under no illusions that romantic partnerships are easy, but we also know affairs happen for a multitude of reasons. Many cases of infidelity can be mended, repaired, and used as a growth opportunity for the couple. We are here to walk this excruciating journey with you- we know where the guideposts are, we know what recovery looks like. Sometimes you will feel like you’re backsliding, but it’s only a product of healing. It’s a confusing and painful experience, but often, in the end, absolutely worth it. We are here to help.

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The Gray Space Between Us:Understanding Black-and-White Thinking in Human Relationships

In the human experience, it’s tempting to reduce life into binaries: good or bad, right or wrong, love or hate. These cognitive shortcuts, which you might call dichotomous thinking or black-and-white thinking, can appear to provide clarity. But they actually distort our reality and strain our relationships.

We love our partners yet feel deep frustration over their quirks or behaviors. We eagerly anticipate hosting the holidays but quietly dread the emotional labor involved. We adore our children, yet still feel bored, overwhelmed, exhausted, or even resentful of them.

This does not mean we’re broken. It means we’re human.

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